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TARIQ MAHMOOD MIAN |
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BENAZIR'S 'ARTEFACTS' In an unimpressive show, the National Accountability Bureau on Sep.3, put on display a total of 11 artefacts reportedly belonging to former prime minister Benazir Bhutto and her spouse Asif Ali Zardari. The items shown to the press for about 10 minutes even included a portrait of Benazir Bhutto herself along with her daughter.  No
documentary evidence was, however, shown to establish that these artefacts
belonged to the former first couple or brought from London or had anything
to do with corruption or any other wrongdoing. The mediamen raised a number
of questions about the authenticity of the items put on display but a whole
lot of NAB civil and uniformed officials present on the occasion refused
to disclose anything except a brief general statement by an assistant director
of federal investigation agency. At least no one at the show was impressed
that so much talked about and widely publicized corruption case involved
a couple of friezes, a tea set and a portrait of Benazir Bhutto which could
not be called an antique.
(DAWN)
(Ausaf) "The City Nazim is very upset because he thinks he has the ugliest room in the entire KMC head-office; I want something done about it immediately!" "Yes Sir, " the interior decorator replies. "I'll take those mirrors out right away!" NAB... "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted and used against you." I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals, I'm a vegetarian because 
I hate plants. (A.B. VAJPAEE) A lady of Kot Addu who was being persecuted by her relatives over a property dispute was made to suffer further when Nawabzada Nasrullah Khan used his influence to trap her son in a murder case. After that, another politician Mian Ata Muhammad Qureshi came to her house to express sympathy but ended up asking for the hand of her 18 year old daughter in marriage for himself. (daily Khabrain) CHILDHOOD DISCLOSURES: Shehbaz Sharif came home from the playground with a bloody nose, black eye, and torn clothing. It was obvious he'd been in a bad fight and lost. While his father was patching him up, he asked his son what happened. "Well, Abbajee," said Shehbaz, "I challenged Nawaz to a duel. And, you know, I gave him his choice of weapons." "Uh-huh," said Abbajee, "that seems fair." "I know, but I never thought
he'd choose Suhail Zia Butt!"
 Extravagance Suffering losses running into billions every year, PIA still prefers to get its in-flight magazine, Humsafar, printed and published from Hong Kong, has four foreigners out of seven on its editorial board. Furthermore its editor, who appears to be a Pakistani, has his offices in Bangkok! Bravo, keep spending like this and squeeze hapless domestic passengers by increasing the fare every quarter. (M. Fasihuddin- DN)
According to Insaf, Allama Tahirul Qadri of Awami Tehreek, while addressing a mammoth gathering at Jalalpur Jatan, said that Prophet PBUH had handed over the key of Nizam Mustafa to him in his dream and that he was now walking towards karbala with the blessings of the family of the Prophet PBUH. According to Nawa-e-Waqt, he told the crowds that he would become prime minister in 2002. According to Khabrain, he promised the poor masses free electricity up to 100 units.
Abida Hussain returned from a visit with his therapist and approached her husband, Fakhr Imam. "After three years of therapy, I've learned that I have to stop talking about myself. So, you'll have to start talking about me."
Q:From where to borrow money? A:Borrow it from pessimists or Pakistani banks; they don't expect it back.
Those who attended the meeting on June 27, 2001 include: Mian Azhar, Asfandyar Wali, Aftab Shaikh, Qazi Hussain Ahmed, Maulana Fazlur Rehman, Sardar Farooq Leghari, Maulana Shah Ahmed Noorani, Hamid Nasir Chattha,Dr Tahirul Qadri, Imran Khan, Abdul Hayee Baloch, Wasim Sajjad, Allama Sajid Naqvi, Mir Hazar Khan Bijrani, Air Marshal (retd.) Asghar Khan, Maulana Samiul Haq, Ajmal Khattak, monkeys.... An unconstitutional and undemocratic government is like a tree full of monkeys.... all on different limbs... at different levels... some climbing up. The monkeys on the top look down and see a tree full of smiling faces. The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing but assholes.
Technical Notes From the Author: These quips and graphics, which I gather for my comments from electronic and print media , are not an absolute reflection of my personality nor do they convey the entire spectrum of my political posture. (I have stronger feelings on some issues than those that I express on this page.) I am not left-brain or right-brain dominant. (I'm just dominant) I've been told by my friends that I think and often speak from a centralized location in my posterior, whatever that means. |
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